Fake or Ballin'?

The other day I was asked a very interesting question by my fiancĂ©e’ about guys. To paraphrase, the question was: why is it that us women are attracted to the guys who seem to be the flashiest and sometimes the fakest, but we ignore the real guys who are being them selves.

You meet a guy or girl and the first thing you notice about them is there appearance. Are they neatly groomed, is there hair done, body type, etcetera. I myself like the eccentric, different type, very laid back, professional type but at I have to admit those kinds of guys are still eye catching. However, I found out from experience most of them where up to no good or had some serious ego problem. However please keep in mind this is just my experience…

Now days it seems that everyone feels the need to be BAWWLLIN’ like Jim Jones. Making crazy money and having the “new” everything is understood to me, I like new things too, but why have to be flashy with it. The newest car, the newest gear with the newest Jordan’s to match and as one rapper has put it, “money long as a limo”. Please young men, if you’re so called ballin’, and you still live with your moms, and she bought you that stuff, let’s please not use this term.

I’m not sayin’ I’m a gold digger, but um, it does help if you have something to work with. The majority of young ladies out there would have to agree with me on that one. I do know through from experience that everything that glitters, is most certainly not gold.

Most of the guys who have all the bling, bling and look like they stepped out the latest video on BET have major ego issues and are trying to prove something or be something that they aren’t. Now also I do know that there are some young men out there who are by all mean not faking anything and are on the grind 24/7 makin’ they paper, and by all means in the words of Kat Williams “Make yo’ paper boo”, but I also know that there are some of you who are frontin’. I also know that there are some females who are into or fall for this type of stuff and not necessarily the one that’s going to treat them right.

I think there are a lot of young women, such as myself who are guilty of doing this at least once, and then learned a valuable lesson. Don’t get me wrong there is most certainly nothing wrong with a brotha who looks like they are really doing something and doesn’t look like they’re faking it.

So next time you do meet that dude who’s looking right, make sure you get to know him first find what they’re about, you’ll know how to spot a fake one, and if you don’t check out my next article series coming up shortly.


  1. Robert Logan II

    THANK YOU! Finally some one says it. Its like some of ya chicks congratulate or just ignore fakery and then complain about the dude after 2 weeks of kickin it with him. I love to shine too but if cant afford it im not bout to buy that cheap ass shit in the middle of the mall or from the gimiky hip hop store, ill get it from a place where i can have at least a warrenty on it. and i dont mean buy silver and making every one think its platinum. Im old school baby its gold or white gold on mine, oh yea one more thing if your diamond stud is as big as your freakin knuckle and you only paid maybe 200-300 dollars dude the shit is fake! Stop Playin your self lol. but any way Mrs. Devine great article!

  2. it depends, but nowadays, women like the fake, chk these out and let me know if u agree

    seduction or sincerity

    the perfect man

  3. Hey Torrance I agree some what with that seduction or sincerity post. Younger women do like the flashiness but personally I enjoy the sincerity too.

  4. GREAT BLOG...

    There was a time in my life those fake ballin brothers caught my attention but I as I grew up and learned what life is all about I knew what I really wanted and needed and I'm glad that I found him.

  5. Hi Dasha,

    I'm out lurking on Miz's site and saw your comment, but I can't read the blogger address. If you would be so kind as to drop in and share a smile, I'd like to read your blog. It's kinda hard to see in this tiny comment window...lol

    Intimate Outings of Love