I've Been The Best Girlfriend/Wife, Why Do I Keep Getting My Heart Broken?

5.10.2011



This is a question that has plagued women for years. I've been through it and I've listened to friends who have been though it.

If I do everything for this guy and be the best girlfriend or wife ever, I should get that same treatment in return, right?!

By all means sister, I'd say YES, it's true you should.....but, in many relationships it doesn't happen that way.

I think it goes back to, "You can't change a man". With the experiences I've had, they're either going to have to want to change for themselves or it's just not going to happen. As a woman, all you can do is control your actions. If a guy wants to be in a relationship with you, he'll do like Spike Lee said and "Do The Right Thing".

I love hard, and I know alot of my friends do also. If I love you, you can have my everything (I'm an only child so sharing really isn't exactly the strongest aspect of my personality). Maybe, that has been my mistake in lot of relationships though. Sometimes you stick around long enough to realize that that reciprocation of love your looking for may never happen.

I was in a relationship once where I was continually questioning myself, "Why is it when I do A,B,C for him, he act like he doesn't care or it doesn't count?" Or my favorite question,"Why When I call him, he says
he'll call back but doesn't?" (blog topic coming soon about this one!)The answer was in the question. He didn't really care and I couldn't make him. All the wishing and praying in the world wasn't going to change him. It was so frustrating, because I saw so much potential in this guy but his inconsistency and the poor rollercoaster ride my heart had been on...Well I just couldn't take it any longer.

Remember Taraji Henson's character Yvette in the movie "Baby Boy"? She had the same question, "Why Jody, Why?"!

I have been told that sometimes you have to show a person how to treat you, but if they don't catch on....then what? To be honest, I think it's a waiting game and sometimes it's black or white.

But when you love someone, it's hard to see black or white. There's usually many shades of grey.

Either wait on them to start consistently treating you better, like you want to be treated or kick 'em to the curb.

What do y'all think? Don't forget to leave comments!

4 comments:

  1. THIS is me right now!!! "love DEFINITELY makes it hard to see black or white."

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  2. Thanks for your comment TishaJade! I'm glad you was able to relate to this post. I think alot of young women have been in this position. It's hard.

    -NA

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  3. After my previous relationship which I always feel needing to be perfect for my ex but he treat me indifferently..even if I asked him why he acted the way he was? He always beating around the bushes and in the end, I am more puzzled. I come to conclusion that He Just Not Into ME and I hate the fact it feels he playing games with me.. so much for "oh baby, you're the best" speech.

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  4. Hey Shareena,

    Love is confusing! I agree though sometimes you just finally realize, he's just no that into me as I am into him. No need to waste anymore time after that. Thanks for you comment as always girl!

    -NA

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